The Blog of auroraborealis

Have you ever been so tense that when you started drinking the pain from your muscles relaxing was excruciating?    That's what happened last night.   I had a bit to drink and I was watching the movie "Dan in Real Life" and the muscle pain in my chest and back was so excruciating that it hurt to breathe.   On Friday I was so tense that I got a double charly horse--one in each leg at the same time--and they were really, really bad ones, too.   But I actually slept last night--I slept for 11 1/2 hours.   And I just woke up from a two hour nap.   I'm on a mini bender.    I just started drinking again and the pain in my back and neck is so bad that it's leaving me nauseated.   But that's a good thing.   By the time I'm done, I'm hoping to feel human again.

I'm getting that "really hurts to breathe" feeling again, it's horrible, but at the same time good.   It's not one of those pains that hurts good, it hurts really, really bad, but I know I'm doing the right thing.    When I finally get through the pain I will be able to relax again.   And when I am able to relax, I'll be able to sleep easily.  And when I am able to relax and sleep easily, I well be able to focus on things again--that's a good thing.   A very good thing.   But until I get to that point I just need to face the pain--it's the only way to get through it.