Whatever | auroraborealis's Blog

I can't do my job.   I can't do it.    All I can think about is wanting to die.   I know how.   I keep walking through it over and over.    It's the only thing that brings me any comfort.    I don't want to live in a world where my only option is to be as cruel and hateful as everyone else.   Outside of being cruel and hateful or dying, my only other option is to simply not have anything to do with anyone.    That's probably the way I'll end up going.    Just shut the world out.    I hate everything.   Life is so unfair.   It's totally unfair.    All I want is to know what I did that was so bad.   What have I done to deserve this?    Will someone please tell me what I've done that was so bad?????   TELL ME!!!!!!!!!!!!    I don't get what I'm doing wrong.   I just don't get it.    I need help but there is no help.   There's nothing to be done.   Nothing.   Because people are cold, mean and hateful and no one cares.     No one.   

I can't stop sobbing.    I've reached the end of my rope.    ALl I can think about is how badly I want to die.    There's no where to go from here.   Nothing will ever change.   Ever.    If I continue to live every day will be just as horrible as the last because there truly is no hope for this world or anyone in it.   I need help.   I'm worth saving.   But there's nothing that can be done.   Nothing.    I'm out of options.   I can't do this anymore.